All Platypussies Run Free!

Yo Yo Yo (Bye Bye Bye)

2007-12-05T08:58:00.001-05:00

We're moving up into the stratosphere, so every thing's moved to the new site! Go there and rock out hard!

Moths (courtesy of C. Neil Scott)

2007-08-19T14:55:00.000-04:00

the lesson of the moth

By Don Marquis (from "archy and mehitabel" 1927)

i was talking to a moth
the other evening
he was trying to break into
an electric light bulb
and fry himself on the wires

why do you fellows
pull this stunt i asked him
because it is the conventional
thing for moths or why
if that had been an uncovered
candle instead of an electric
light bulb you would
now be a small unsightly cinder
have you no sense

plenty of it he answered
but at times we get tired
of using it
we get bored with the routine
and crave beauty
and excitement
fire is beautiful
and we know that if we get
too close it will kill us
but what does that matter
it is better to be happy
for a moment
and be burned up with beauty
than to live a long time
and be bored all the while
so we wad all our life up
into one little roll
and then we shoot the roll
that is what life is for
it is better to be a part of beauty
for one instant and then cease to
exist than to exist forever
and never be a part of beauty
our attitude toward life
is come easy go easy
we are like human beings
used to be before they became
too civilized to enjoy themselves

and before i could argue him
out of his philosophy
he went and immolated himself
on a patent cigar lighter
i do not agree with him
myself i would rather have
half the happiness and twice
the longevity

but at the same time i wish
there was something i wanted
as badly as he wanted to fry himself

archy

You know you wanna

2007-08-09T21:28:00.001-04:00

Looks like someone needs to watch a sexual harassment filmstrip

2007-07-26T04:23:00.000-04:00

Admire my Plumes

2007-07-04T22:28:00.000-04:00

No matter what your specialty is, it's important to take inspiration from as many sources as humanly possible. Color schemes from peanut butter jars, Harmonies from mathematical sequences, Sculpture materials from the junkyard, etc. It's all about throwing it all together with a bit of hot glue gun action. That's why you've got to take a look at the Lyre Bird

Retrospective of the Lyre Bird

This is really inspiring to me. I'm gonna work some more on my camera with a motor drive impression.

Cambodia Rocks!

2007-07-01T22:22:00.000-04:00

As the Summer days stretch on and on, we need more and more to entertain us here at Platypussy Records. Time to stretch out those roots and expand on previous obsessions... like Sublime Frequencies.

Don't Think I've Forgotten

Above is a clip from a documentary film on the music of Cambodia during the 60s and 70s. There's already several stellar releases on the subject, and I'll vouch that it's one of the hottest 'unexplored' territories in World Music. So can't we give the mightly Djembe drum a rest and get spiritual with some electric guitar? Hopefully we'll see a release on this film soon, but until then I'm left drooling. But here's some newer karaoke videos to sing along with until that time.

Chattin up the younger ladies

Wooly Bully By the Pool

No. 1 Music Video (Masturbation?)

2007-06-26T22:06:00.000-04:00

We're just reaching for the sky here.

Spank The Monkey by Skot Walden

But what about dildos? I've got your answer right here with a close number 2 best video featuring masturbation.

You're not a Torry, are you?

2007-06-26T21:16:00.000-04:00

Now that the Masturbation is catching on like wildfire among our nation's youths, there's only one question left to answer. Where are they learning about Masturbation?

Wanker World

It's not just the kids though. Masturbation is affecting all levels of our society, from rich to poor. If you don't believe me, just take a look at this video from an up and coming star, possibly related to the one and only Joe Roberts.

Lonely Man Blues

Honorable Mention

2007-06-25T01:01:00.001-04:00

Not a Top 5 masturbation song. Maybe not a masturbation song at all. But close on both counts.

Speaking of art house animations

2007-06-19T01:56:00.000-04:00

If you haven't had a chance to see "The Animation Show", compiled by Don Hertzfeld and Mike Judge, consider yourself eagerly encouraged. The film below is on volume one, as are the following by Adam Elliot, and they are incredible. There is another called "Uncle", but I can't find it anywhere online.

Brother

Cousin

I am a Disco Dancer

2007-06-16T02:12:00.000-04:00

Disco the Buggles

Bollywood, Oh! Bollywood! Where did this obsession begin? Maybe in Russia, where Bollywood movies played fairly often during daytime TV. Then it all blew up, but not modern Bollywood. We're talking oldies. Covers of Western hits reimagined in Hindi. Low production values, aggrandized plots and portrayal rendered a stylized version of everyday life that seems much more fabulous than the real thing could ever be. But don't get depressed! Use it as a guide to influence your interactions in this life. Take everything to extremes! DANCE!

I am a Disco Dancer

The proverbial title track. At this point in the movie, out star has already changed his destiny substantially. Growing up as a fatherless street child who performed for food with a foster father figure/wandering street performer, Jimmy's mother worked as a maid for a very rich and powerful man... the father of Disco Sam. Sam was the King of Indian Disco, if not the whole world. But when a rambunctious street performance leads Jimmy and his mentor into the grounds of this private residence to play with the daughter, it invites trouble. Seeing the lower classes swarming around his private property, the father takes Jimmy's guitar and stops the entire song and dance. He threatens to have Jimmy arrested after pushing down his mother, who hurts her head on a rock and almost dies. But no one will believe the street child Jimmy. Oh injustice!

Jimmy, Adja!

His rise to fame attracts the jealous of disposed Disco King Sam and his father, who conspire to bring Jimmy down. Sabotaging a guitar to be presented to Jimmy at an awards ceremony with a live current of deadly electricity, their victory seems assured when suddenly Jimmy's mother, aware of the assassination plot, grabs the guitar before Jimmy can. Killed in a flash of technicolor madness, the villains are foiled but Jimmy develops a guitar phobia, rendering him unable to perform just days before the international Disco Championship. What can be done? Jimmy's girlfriend does her best to motivate him not to give in, but is unsuccessful. Woe unto us! But just as the shoes are beginning to fly from the audience, a man steps into the theatre. It's Jimmy's former mentor, the street performer! He reprises an earlier tune about the poor not having money, but always having their songs and throws his guitar to Jimmy. They scream at each other, battling wills in a brief moment, and then the rest is left up to Jimmy, with a watchful audience...

Yaad Aa Raha Hai

True fans will be obliged to own or at least watch the entire film, which is an honest underground classic. You can find copies for around $3 from Eros Entertainment, or (lucky lucky) watch it online! No english subs though!

Jon the Dog

2007-06-14T22:08:00.000-04:00

Rare "Live" Footage

Just a short clip to keep the obsession burning. It's hard to find live event listings in Japanese, but if we can manage it we'll do our best to get more info on this mysterious woman. However, for our more pervy readers, let it be known that there's some rather tasteful nude photography featuring John and a white rabbit friend in the book 'Universe for Rent'. Highly recomended reading!

More of English in Japan

2007-06-12T22:19:00.000-04:00

Ah Japan! Ever ready source of inspiration!

Ever since Japan's borders were forced open by some heavyhanded diplomacy, the world's had a thing for our neighbors to the east. Call it Orientalism, Yellow Fever, ... whatever! But we know genius when we see it here at Platypussy Records, so let the naysayers nay away!

Let's Play in English Japanese Kids' Show

Ahh, English in Japan... granted yours truly wouldn't be here if it wasn't for a series of government programs stretching back to the beginning of Japan's interaction with the West. Foreign Advisers were imported to bring the country into 'modernity', but at what cost? Well maybe things moved a little too fast. English words, often absorbed as jargon long before their linguistic roots were studied to the point of understanding, have flooded and mutated inside of Japan. Rendered with a phonetic alphabet which does not recognize consonants but only consonant and vowel combinations, words like 'dog' and 'cat' become 'doggu and catto'. Incorrect to native speakers... trendy to the Japanese? They say the average elementary school student in Japan already knows 1000 English words via their Japanese pronunciations.

Great Hamburger

Eric is a 'tarento'. But who can blame him, he's living the dream. Appearing in a regular NHK educational segment, he jams on his guitar in a way that would make him welcome on any of our tours. Yet are we fooling ourselves here? Is this really a way to English fluency/proficiency? With their English scores being some of the lowest in modernized Asia in addition to all the money being thrown at the problem, what's the deal? Why learn English anyway?

Exercise, Drama, .... English?

Because you might get mugged in a highly dangerous foreign country! In addition to blaming many internal crimes on foreigners (Ethnic Chinese and Korean immigrants are largely seen to be the force behind organized crime in Japan), most Japanese seem quick to point out the dangerousness of most Western countries. Maybe so, since media of all kinds sensationalizes violence, but then again couldn't it have something to do with how foreigners are depicted in popular culture? They used to appear quite often as low level thugs for evil guys due to their stature and physiques. Especially black men. In fact, up until 20 years ago, blackface singers, mascots, etc were highly mainstream. Even now, Lil' Black Sambo still lives on in the 'cuteness' market of children's books and plushies. Why does it seem like Japan is living in the past?

Peekaboo!

This could be just a simple case of being to serious... Japan is notorious for having one of the longest 'childhoods' in the world, so much so that it's not uncommon for adults to be obsessed with stuffed animals and wear plastic accessories of a whimsical nature. Ultimately, English education for children will always have to fall into Edutainment. Why not join the Bliss Abyss and grab an instrument? Cuteness will back you up, 1000%. Alongside insanity from Japan.

Who brings the candy?

2007-06-08T19:49:00.000-04:00

Poor kids got drum machines?

2007-06-08T01:24:00.000-04:00

Platypussy, Inc. as a natural trend avoids realms pop music and techno, in no small part because both leave scant room for improvisation. If only there was a way to truly compose spontaneously (knob twisting don't count), one that didn't involve a great deal of software and hardware...and music comes full circle with the beatbox. The human voice is the most primitive source of music, yet the beatbox melds that organic instrument with the sounds electronic music has born in the last few decades. Beatboxing is admittedly a little goofy, but we're allowed our guilty pleasures:
First, the professional (notice the crossover appeal with the crowd):

Another "Idol" phenomenon from abroad:

But if that's a little too polished for you, the hybrid raw gremlin style:

Has every industrial nation now cashed in on an "Idol"?

Belgium has a beatbox champion? Roxorloops...

This also came up during the search. Why not?

Finally, the true Platypussy style:

Campy horror in your own backyard

2007-06-06T11:44:00.000-04:00

Why can't Americans keep up with crazy visionary Japanese horror films? Always looking for the quick buck, perhaps?

Spooky, Yet Satisfying

2007-06-05T22:55:00.000-04:00

Like most things awesome, today's post is inspired by a product of a foreign culture. Japanese culture! Nobuhiko Obayashi was/is (he's got a new movie coming out soon, but you'll never see them outside of Nippon) a great experimental director. His aesthetic is noted for it's complete lack of conservative reserve, often instead opting to throw every effect in the book and then some into his films. The result? Genius.

House Trailer

Hausu (House without the Katakana accent) was released in 1977. It features 7 young girls who go to visit their aunt. It's been suggested that this movie be regarded as a parody of the horror genre since each girl seems a grotesque version of stereotypical characters (a chronic overeating fat girl, a pretty girl, a nerdy girl... etc.). In fact in the beginning of the film, you could easily mistake it for some sort of hippy revisioning of a Marx Brothers film.

In the Beginning...

Then the anacondas are let lose from the zoo and your world is turned upside down. Worse than any delusional 'There be snakes on this plane" utterance, you've got to worry about cat paintings vomiting blood and instruments with appetites. All beautifully represented with pre-CGI effects. Charming? Of course! Inspiring? All the more so!

Death By Piano

Rock-a-fire Explosion

2007-06-04T22:07:00.000-04:00

Welcome to Showbiz Pizza

Ahhh, Showbiz Pizza. That's nostalgic... way back when Saturday Morning Cartoons were good and Pizza was riding the wave of popularity brought on by highly trained amphibians with Renaissance Fair Flair, there was Showtime Pizza. Later bought out by the soulless Chuck E. Cheese (just look at the name for God's sake! He sounds Wall street already!) Showbiz Pizza was the original pizza place with arcade and robotic slave band. There was Billy Bob Brockali, Fatz Geronimo, Mitzi Mozzerella, Dook Larue, and Beach Bear, along with a whole bunch of 'gag' characters.

The "Faith" Show

There were also various performance reels that the restaurant could buy, each containing different 'sets' and programmed movements for the 'cast'. Unfortunately Showbiz seemed to lose the arms race against Chuck E. Cheese, eventually leading to all my Showbiz points becoming null and void.

Creative Engineering INC. made all of the robotics for Showbiz/Chuck E. Cheese. But they also made individual robots, including several various ape characters. A robot ape who speaks Shakespeare? Sounds like genius to this humble writer! But could the talking robotic monkey fetish be the beginning of the end?

Will the GoWilla

By the time the Myrtle Beach Showbiz converted into a Chuck E. Cheese's, I began to lose the faith. Sure, the temptation of using my good grades to receive tokens was still there (I remember a kid wanted to borrow my report card to score some tokens), but why spend my time in a place that smelled more and more like urine as the years piled on? Plus eventually, there weren't even any robots! The Cyberstar show came along, and all the action was being televised, I guess while the real band went on tour.

Cyberstar Fractured Rock

But was this all elaborate fantasy? Is the past always better than the here and now? For more answers, we need to take a look at the people behind the scenes. What about the character actors who had to live under the shadow of the robot talent?

Walkabout Training Video

Little Boxes

2007-06-03T23:26:00.000-04:00

Malvina Reynolds! I first learned about her though a cover song my friend and occasional poster Miss Betty Cake. Well, unfortunately YouTube only has three pages of results on this wonderful woman, most of which are covers in the genre of 'Guitar Guys'. Damn!

Little Boxes

This song is featured currently as the theme song to Weeds, a series on Showtime. I like Malvina's version a lot and really dig this claymation version a fan put together, but I think Miss Betty Cake's version tops them all!

No Hole In My Head

This song is punk as fuck. Don't be confused by the singer's apperance; it was never supposed to be about looks! Just as badass as the story about how she supposedly wrote Little Boxes:

"I was once introduced as the woman who'd written so many songs, she must write one every day before breakfast. That wasn't true, so one morning I decided I better write a song before breakfast, and out came 'Little Boxes'."

That's right. Malvina whips out folk classics before breakfast.

Little Red Hen

Get it? Little RED Hen. Take that, House Un-American Activities Committee.

Thrifting the Past

2007-06-01T21:56:00.000-04:00

Malakapalakadoo, Skip Two

This lovely gem is brought to us by the AV Geeks. We highly recommend checking out their archives, which are assembled from old news reels, presentations on schoolroom lunch manners, and sex education reels. Most of their archive can be viewed at the Internet Archive. In the past, this archive has been used by artists like Negativland and People Like Us to great effect. And because most of it was never designed for mass marketing, it's all under the Creative Commons. So get to work and start mixing up some video! You can expect us to be hard at work doing the same, with the Platypussy Friendship DVD finally coming to light this summer!

Three Holes

Special Time

It's wonderful to know that the Internet will help people share these gems for time immortal. However, it seems to lose a little bit of luster when not presented by a crusty gym coach with a speech impediment. But with a little makeup and wardrobe, I'm sure you could bootleg the magic yourself.

Platypussy 2006 Sampler

2007-04-26T23:39:00.000-04:00

You can get your own copy to embed in your own damn blog here:
www.last.fm/label/Platypussy/playlists

If you are reading this you are probably already planning on being a part of the 2007 double-disc "Lovers Love Lovers/Haters Hate Haters" release; if not, go ahead and start a band today so you can join up.

Dangerous cathartic behaviors in music scene

2007-04-11T11:46:00.000-04:00

Here we see Xiu Xiu frontman Jamie Stewart, in a shocking break from his trademark sadness, stuffing his face with a strawberry cupcake.

And the same from his cousin, bandmate Caralee McElroy. Dangerous behaviors are often learned through family more quickly than through peers.

Poor Will from Daemon Flushboy shows us how young people will quickly emulate and adopt the vices of their heroes...and he's not even 21!

Grabblin'

2007-04-08T07:40:00.000-04:00

Noodling Catfish a.k.a. Devil Fish

Hot Girls Click THERE!!!

Wrap It Up

2007-04-08T07:38:00.003-04:00

Photo 63edit, originally uploaded by Platypussy Records.

Who You Union Jackin?

2007-04-08T07:38:00.001-04:00

Photo 61edit, originally uploaded by Platypussy Records.

Space is The Place

2007-04-08T07:37:00.001-04:00

mchabeusedit, originally uploaded by Platypussy Records.

Can't Stop Won't Stop

2007-04-08T07:36:00.001-04:00

mcabeus2edit, originally uploaded by Platypussy Records.

Mc Habeus Corpus on the front lines.

How sweet the sound...

2007-03-28T23:57:00.000-04:00

Perhaps the most disturbing use of the most familiar song in American history.

But at least somebody sent the old girl out with a little class.

Drunken Animals Study

2007-03-13T01:05:00.000-04:00

So, you thought it'd be all gold records and world tours once you started your animal band? Well, think again! Furry rock stars are just a susceptible to the hazards of a rock and roll lifestyle as you and me. Hopefully this will serve as a cautionary tale.

Squirrel

Cat

Mice

Jonny Olsen

2007-03-12T09:42:00.000-04:00

The Khaen/Kaen/Khene/Khen is a free reed instrument from Laos (or Northern Thailand... there's an ongoing dispute over this it seems), and it's going to be kicking your ass all this year if I have anything to say about it. With one on its way from Thailand to the Platypussy Records Instrument Vault, the real question for 2007 is "Which awesome band doesn't play this hypnotic instrument?" Answer: Trick Question. All awesome bands have one.

Picnic Style in Laos

But what do you do if you wanna jam out old school in electric city? Well don't worry, you don't have to fly your gig out to Southeast Asia (even though the neon jumpsuits and pantsuits are calling out to you), because you can buy this instrument online through a few sources. Usually through National Geographic pimps.

Oh, but you're 2 Legit 2 Quit? You said a mouth full, hammer-pants. Quicker than your trained parakeet can squawk "Don't hurt 'em, Hammer," Jonny Olsen will give the inspiration and precedent you need to conquer the Thai/Laotian Molam scene. Nicknamed "The Farang Khaen Master" (Farang means foreigner), Jonny boy moved to Laos and took lessons on this country boy instrument and quickly became a darling in his own right.

Jonny Olsen is Big Pimpin'

You should take your own lesson from this video. But if anything, I want you to realize two things: 1) the West is getting its ass kicked by ignoring blue screen technology, and 2) if you follow your dreams, no matter how ridiculous or illegal they may be, you'll always be on the Platypussy path.

Dinosaur Hiring Policy

2007-03-01T21:32:00.000-05:00

We're always on the look-out for new Platypussy Recruits here! All ages, genders, shoe sizes, and webbed toes welcome. But sometimes it's hard to beat Mother Serendipity:

New Platypussies

Of course, we offer a comprehensive benefits package for all new Platies, including online training courses and a degree achievement program. Ask about our internet discount for reading this post, or just watch the sample below from one of our recent training weekends!

The Elusive Pink Dinosaur

No pressure of course. 99 days or your sanity back, guaranteed. Our work ethic? Someone who can freestyle for 5 minutes at least to a repeditive riff while constantly delivering quality impressions in a results driven environment. Screams and howls may earn you your first golden star on the way to "Platypussy of the Month!"

The Dinosaur Song

And last but not least, ask about our Heritage Program, where young members not yet able to get our EULA tattoo'd on their spine can be sponsored by a member of the community! It's a classic win-win situation, with an essay concert to boot. First prize: Summer Internship for possible credit at the Platypussy Institute of America. ^_^

Braaaaiiinnsss

Mating Dances Study

2007-03-01T19:07:00.000-05:00

Ladybug Love

Albatrossy Amore

Dino DP

CUTE OVERLOAD

2007-02-11T21:59:00.000-05:00

Danish bunny steeplechase.

Going solo

2007-02-11T03:20:00.000-05:00

These Platypussies have lost their bandmates!!! Can you help them find their way through the maze to musical freedom?
One man Band

the one man band

One Man Band

One Man Band

DON'T FORGET! WFMU IS BRINGING THE 365 DAYS PROJECT BACK FOR 2007! CHECK OFTEN AT BLOG.WFMU.ORG

Shuddup, you!

2007-02-07T11:16:00.000-05:00

S2pid iz te noo kewl. Seriously though, I was having a hearty discussion with my lady friend about that old socialism. The obvious turnoff for me regarding socialism is that it restricts individual expression (to varying degrees depending on whose ideals such a system is being built upon), and is basically an admission that we're too irresponsible and inconsiderate to keep it lassez-faire. Having watched the "stupidity" documentary just now, that turnoff is actually starting to look pretty good right now. Which means that documentary has the same effect as alcohol (which itself is a large part of the problem). On a hardly-related note, could someone please inform the media that environmentalism is actually an effort to preserve the natural world (which includes EVERY SINGLE PERSON) and not the "environmental lobby"? The "tobacco lobby" protects the interests of tobacco companies, as do the "oil lobby" and "pharmaceutical lobby" ad nauseum etcetera. I promise to be as apolitical as possible in the world of Platypussies but I think we should periodically remember to pay attention to issues that may one day affect both our freedom to express and our physical ability (no electricity for recording devices, carcinogenics in our art supplies...) to express our creativity and individuality. With that in mind, please do me a favor and slash the tires of the next person you hear refer to the environment as a special-interest entity. For your diligence, here are some of the hilarious residuals of free-market capitalism!

What's a burger machine?

GOOD CREDIT, BAD CREDIT, NO CREDIT...WE OWN THE BAAANK!!!

Documentary on 'Stupidity'

2007-02-07T05:55:00.000-05:00

Check it out here on Google Video. But if you're really smart, why are you spending your time watching videos on the Internet? Shouldn't you be reading Marx, Dickens, or some Freakonomics? Seriously though, this BBC documentary addresses a lot of issues that have been in my mind the past 5 years or so. At least ever since George Bush got a second term.

Then again, sometimes the smartest thing you can do is to educate yourself with truly worthless knowledge. Wanna try a documentary on the fight for Tetris? Go ahead, it's Platypussy recommended!

Oh and as a secret bonus for reading this far in a world of 3 second attention spans... a bit of spoken word on the history of the Amen beat...

More from Kelly Flushboy

2007-02-04T22:58:00.000-05:00

TRANSCENDENTAL CLEAN


Are you clean enough for Japan?
That's the honest question.

Because you'll never feel dirtier in your life as is
on your best day next to a native there.

Everything in Japan comes down to the hands and feet,
preceding everything else.

So yeah-we've been washing and worrying in the wrong
places.

Have a meal-have a handiwipe first. 

No handshake to sense where you're at.
The cleaner you are-the more respect you get.

Burger King be damned-if it cost next to
nothing--better wash up first.

Petting zoo. no brainer?
sorry...

Petting zoo you think you can get away with germs.
Hell no-you get sedated and sanctioned if you don't
wash your hands before and after groping with goats
and hogs.

An activity that would get you called sissy on back
woods Appalachian roads-but not in Japan.

Japan is the hen pecking girlfriend that won't let us
pick our ears in public because god or the milk man is
watching.

No spitting.no fighting.no cursing.no sperm.no jacking
off residue on dresses or else.

not without a 4 x 4 ply piece of paper,alcohol,and
Buddha between you and the amoebas that mean you harm.

Germs are an exact science in Japan.

you cannot,Cannot blow your nose in public in japan.

Sounds simple, right? Try having a cold there.

it is worse than Janet's breast at the Superbowl.
you might as well set the clock back to Godzilla time
in Japan if any mucus hits the tidy non cobble
streets.

Tsunamis,girl child abortions, non-carb diets...so
what.

No illness allowed.

And if you don't have your surgical white Cotton masks
in hand in japan, double forget it.

Before Michael Jackson, there was Japan.
They made preventative a fashion icon.

It's almost what you can't see-than the obvious-that
they're scared of. Boogie San is alive and well.

Anyone who oozes is a nationale threat;
did the Sex Pistols even ever get to tour there...??

So then, how DOES the place deal with bumping uglies
you ask?

Music for 1 Apartment, 6 Drummers

2007-02-03T10:33:00.000-05:00

This is very true to the Platypussy Mantra. Starting out with pots and pans as kids, annoying the hell out of your parents for some attention, or just because you're caught up in the sounds you can make. No need to overthink it and try to write a piece of music; over time your rhythm and pausing will improve to match your own expressions. This is why no one should consider themselves musically incapable, just as one should never simply resign to 'I can't draw' et ceteras. As Sun Ra pointed out, 'music is a spiritual language', and by that token any art or vehicle for living life is an exercise in meeting with your own expressionables. Unmentionables. "Your own personal ambassador... and nemesis to the Creator."

"Fuck 'em if they can't take a joke."

Free Verse on Japan from Kelly Flushboy

2007-02-02T21:12:00.000-05:00

Nothing about Japan makes sense.
That’s what you gotta get in your head straight first.

You may think you have a handle on things; been around.
Seen things.

You have no shit on Japan.

It’s everything you think it may be …
Then multiply that by 10.

You’re still not there yet.
Really.

14 hours of stale air, bad movies, and plastic food and you’re not there yet.

You know that sound the fridge makes, or the ac when you can’t sleep?

That’s what Japan sounds like.

The loudest white noise on earth is Japan.

The kind that would make you confess your deepest likes and sins just to make it stop.

And bright.

Like photo-mart bright.

Like jail on tv bright.

And you- you do alright in your own country, with the looks.

But not in Japan.

You might as well be a ferris wheel, covered in cheddar & chilli in Japan.
Green eyes and modest don’t apply.

Beyond the freak show, you be.
You are the tallest, blondest, square peg in round slot there.

Even the barflies in Japan’s best version of a crap USA bar fit in more comically than you.

But you get over it.
You learn this the first night badly that room service fridge bar tabs and jet lag do not mix.

Your hotel- immaculate. Scary clean.
Massive tile bathroom. Sunken tub.

Water is religion in jJpan; is currency. More so than a suit and the yen.

Over friendly staff to the point of game show is Japan hotel mgt.

You can’t sleep.

That’s the real joke.

Some do-but I think they’re lie.
You watch Oz; American cable; the series on prison; in Japanese and catch up on a series in a week you’re never seen in your life.

You relate- your room is a cell and sanctuary at the same time.

And yes-there are gardens, there’s cod, robes, sake, drunk business men, girls, doesn’t matter ..

There is actual quiet. You have to face. And monks.

Real deal freakin’ monks.

What do you say?
Where is your inner monologue then?

Honestly? It’s shogun, you’re a tourist-and you say _______________?

But it’s twilight zone.
Every thing looks right and tastes right, and once again your trolling the city zoo and museums like you would in any other big city.

Hoping someone thinks your cool has bias. It doesn’t. never does.You’re a faker. even here.

You cannot read or understand anything- so you end up smiling-a lot.
more than you allow yourself in your own state.
as a means of currency.

Japan has all the steps-the style,
but no soul.

Or more so- Tokyo.

There’s jazz, whiskey in cans, sex with vacuums.
I mean-let’s say it—it is Blade Runner.
Pretty. Hard. Weird. No ending.

Everything that reads as right.

But it’s off-there is no backbeat in Japan.

And they know us-they copy us down to a tee-but it’s like having a pet robot.
It’s the body snatchers.

There’s no dirt or funk or gross.
If there is-it’s been staged or copied.

Like teenagers is Japan. Making dear what is the next to be true or valid.

There is no chance of getting into trouble other than the usual in Japan.

But I did. White trash and all. And here’s how…

yo momma's mustache

2007-02-01T20:45:00.001-05:00

yo momma, originally uploaded by Platypussy Records.

Minibattles/DJ Homobattles sighting in Japan.

New Beginnings

2007-02-01T20:44:00.001-05:00

platypussy, originally uploaded by Platypussy Records.

Praise Jesus

2007-02-01T02:00:00.000-05:00

Those Daemon Flushboy fellas have been telling me about the beauty of this, but I had no idea how empty my life really was.

Like, seriously, the internet is just full of things like this:

One last thing (maybe). Okay, two. First, I think we can all thank Katie Couric for creating the smooth script for transitions between clearly unrelated youtube videos. Second, if any of the All Platypussies Run Free readers are interested in forming a stage show that looks something like this please contact me directly.

A Frank and Open Discussion

2007-02-01T01:14:00.000-05:00

Let's talk about citizenship. Now, as far as I'm concerned, there are only two types of citizenship: crazy citizenship and sane citizenship. Back in the FDR days there were programs to channel crazy citizenship into sane citizenship, but not anymore. Hell, you can't even get a loaf of bread from your country much less employ schitzophrenics in the civil service sector anymore! That being said, the following is an example of crazy citizenship working hard for you.

Also, it's one thing to love your country, but what do you do if you love your country but your cat really just can't fucking stand you?

Also, any guesses as to what sort of stuffing one should use if one is making an especially large animal head to go with your animal costume without giving oneself a headache?

Express your love through airbrush

2007-01-31T12:04:00.000-05:00

First of all, the inspiration from MotherStamper herself.

Then I just had to DIMyself

These guys helped by keeping me too scared to sleep. I live in the Glass Menagerie.

Pieces are moving into place

2007-01-30T12:32:00.000-05:00

GET ON THE BUS BECAUSE WE'RE TAKING OFF

OMG! BECKY!~~ LOLzz

2007-01-28T21:34:00.000-05:00

Mall Madness Commercial

With all the recent press on school bullying epidemic and rise of supposed aggression among girls in particular, one has to wonder where it all comes from. Well my friends, look no further than the classic game Pretty Pretty Princess.

A Pretty, Pretty Princess in Action

The theory: Pretty Pretty Princess encourages competition between women, ultimately benefiting men around the world. Why? Look at the rules themselves-- there can only be ONE Pretty Pretty Princess. It's a classic no win situation, ultimately undermining cooperation between women (just like the infamous CIA letters to Black Panther leaders). But let's not be sexist here; who's to say that only women fall prey to the siren's call that is Pretty Pretty Princess...

Rhinestone Records Crush!

2007-01-28T00:10:00.000-05:00

I've had a crush on New Orleans for awhile now. Aside from being a town focused on delicious, cheap eats (a la $3.50 po-boy sandwiches) and remarkable roots in mysticism etc., New Orleans is a model for experimental music in the South.

Quintron in London

There's a lot that's still secret about Quintron's background. Whether he's really a reincarnated Dee Dee Ramone, former science school teacher and electrician, or outlaw chicagoean on the run, one thing is apparant-- the man knows how to rock. He was a part of the Chicago No-wave scene and played in bands like Math and released his first album as a drummer. Years later as a southern transplant and marching band organizer/friend of Ernie K-Doe/organist from hell/inventor, Quintron is truly one of my idols. I think no where else is this more apparent than with his Drum Buddy infomercial video...

The Drum Buddy Show!!!

The Drum Buddy Show is a model for all amateur musicians. We ourselves at Platypussy Records have been immeasurably inspired by its excellence, and hope to finish our Platypussy Friendship video project in order to share a copy with our Rhinestone Records soul brothers and sisters in the big easy. But perhaps before that we'll be seeing some special collaboration with the one and only MC Trachiotomy.

The 19th Hole

Not much is known about MC Trachiotomy. Bob Log III says he's a cool dude, and only recently has a Myspace page surfaced for the man himself. His music combines various frequencies, normal and otherworldly, with a rap flow that ranges from bombastic to train wreck. The man's got range is what I'm trying to say. If you want to hear his best, try to find his 30 minute peformance on WFMU.

Foreigners In Japan

2007-01-23T19:47:00.000-05:00

Japan is a very homogenous country. At a time when teachers are dying naturally brown hair black (lawsuit ensued) and the country is feeling caught between past and future, what role to foreigners play in japan?

Old School Gaijins

The above video should remind you of Tokyo's Golden Era of Insanity during the 90s. My own major crush on Japan comes from this period, when the youngsters in FRUITS fashion hung out in Yoyogi park and in Harajuku, where reclaim the streets type activists had managed to get the streets closed to vehicular traffic. So what next?

Harajuku Station's Yoyogi Park

All of this coolness in the 90s brought a lot of foreigners to Japan. Unfortunately, the 21st century saw the end of the closed street that facilitated the thriving Sunday street scene in Harajuku. It's still a hip section of town, but not what it once was. So what happens when a more conservative Japan meets with the Gaijin rush brought by their awesomeness during the 90s?

Gaijin on Your Block

But even more so than culture, the practical need for English teachers in Japan has allowed so many foreigners to enter an otherwise homogenous society. But are the Japanese ready to face the beast they've created? (Note: ALT stands for Assistant Language Teacher. The JET Programme began in 1987 as an exchange program for students from the UK to teach in public middle and high schools in Japan under the supervision of a trained Japanese Teacher of English, or JTE.)

Dozo Yoroshiku Onegaishimasu

Namen ja neee yo~ ^_^

2007-01-20T21:26:00.000-05:00

Nyaaan! Nyaaan!

Cats got a lot of videos.
More than that song got "Day-Ohs!"
Cats.
Cats are so hot they're heat
Coming out from every street
Lookin for some meat.
Cats.

Not Cat

Cats in Hats

Nameneko

Nameneko is a Japanese cat band. Band of cats? However you scratch it off, these guys are badass. Apparently the whole deal brought on the wrath of the Japanese PETA, who denounced the band and their performances as 'cruelty to animals.' Though Platypussy Records never condones animal cruelty, we must stress that some animals just want to rock. Period. So why not let them smoke and drink at the malt shop? Love's a bird that's gotta be free man. Freebird! (Note: The name 'Nameneko' has the japanese words 'Namen' and 'Neko' in it. 'Namen' roughly translates as 'lick' and is used in the phrase 'Namen ja nee yo!' which means 'Don't mess with/underestimate me.' Neko means cat. Together it's 100% badass)

Graceful aging

2007-01-14T02:53:00.000-05:00

The "gateway" drug

2007-01-13T20:40:00.000-05:00

Ha ha! Lets put a sock on the cat and watch it walk in a stupid manner. Think that's funny?

Think Again.

You know, I see punks like you every day. First you're putting socks and outfits on cats, next thing you know you're in the basement of some deli forcing puppies to do lines of coke while your sicko buddies watch Milo and Otis. You make me sick.

Why even associate with this person?

2007-01-13T02:06:00.000-05:00

Eventually whatever I did to fuck this blog up will clear itself up. This statement can extend to practically everything else. I'm sorry. If you've received a "Save the Date" wedding announcement recently, you might know the feeling. The sensation of knowing that interesting things are happening to other people, by their standards. If this is so, this is my "save the date" announcement in a less specific time window, as things of this nature cannot be measured in calendar days. There is usually a tremendous edginess, and then surely something will happen. As the documentation of the loss of my tan has been thoroughly documented, it's time to move on to the arts and crafts element, starting from the where it began. So we're going to take the beginning of this, and do it nice and easy, and then we're going to do the ending nice and rough. That's the way we do Proud Mary, or, as PP Arnold of the Ikettes could clarify, the first cut is the deepest.

Open up your Furry Heart

2007-01-09T20:12:00.000-05:00

Hopefully I'm not preaching to the choir on this one. I thought everyone knew about Furries. But then I moved to a new city and tried to chat it up with my new friends. Potential friends. How could I know that they would stare their eyelets out at me when I casually mentioned "So you know what Furries are, right?" Wrong, wrong, wrong.

Here's a lesson from Vancouver. Check that bitchin' accent! Is she a robot?

Apparently Furry stories are the new baby-in-a-well story for the 2000's. Or maybe the new Goth news item. Heck, it was even featured in an episode of C.S.I. But for every rabid Furry supporter (you can be sure that us at Platypussy Records back the Furry cause), there's a intolerant anti-Furry somewhere out there.

This is one of the surrealest video finds I've seen lately. Take note of 1) the Furry Fighter Hunter's strange vocal work, which seems to be a common theme in fan videos. Everyone loves a strange, made up voice. I think there's some platy-spirit in that. 2) Mindless Self Indulgence. If you're not familiar, M.S.I. is a rock/metal/goth/furry/raver type band that uses a frequent falsetto voice and repetative lyrics/riffs to compose most of their songs. I first heard them on a Hot Topic sampler disc... you know, back when Gadzooks was beginning to suck clothing wise and Hot Topic wasn't just goth/emo city. They sold those car seatbelt buckle belts, so what did I care! But M.S.I. enjoys popularity in nearly every small teenage subgroup, from furries to ravers to goths to... indie kids? But even inside these smaller groups, there still exists certain special individuals who take things to that next extreme. Meet, the Gangster Furries:

Somewhere behind the fursuits and the online roleplaying/social networks of Furries lies a spirit that's very close to our own here. A need to celebrate and create eccentricity. A desire to wear costumes. An urge to create... fan fic. But has anyone taken time to consider the animals' feelings in all this?

Like-minded people in Texas

2006-11-28T04:02:00.000-05:00

I just received my first package as a lifetime member of the "Always Do Your Best" Fan Club. Membership is a mere $3, and I've already gotten more than my money's worth. There's even an official member card, some candy, and top-notch DIY music and art. Austin continues to amaze. www.alwaysdoyourbest.org

The chorus grows louder

2006-11-27T12:19:00.001-05:00

After a horrendous week of lifting boxes in the cold rain, forgoing sleep for a trip to the hospital, and helping conservatives get their illogical hate brigade messages on public airwaves, I got to see Quintron & Miss Pussycat open up for Peaches at the 9:30 Club. It makes me wonder why I don't work harder on strengthening my creative muscle. Because after last night, there's very little doubt about what I'd rather be doing with my life. Don't be like Bozo Wilzon the Wage Slave, kids! Stop doing your homework and start building instruments!

The Spice Wars Pt. II

2006-11-25T23:39:00.000-05:00

Time for more inspiration. Often artists, musicians, and even the common man have looked to other cultures for inspiration during trying times. But with conception and acceptance of the kitsch aesthetic, it's become necessary to go beyond orientalism and trivialize to discover... Bollywood.

Bollywood (a play on the name "Hollywood") is the name for the film industry in India. Often of a musical song and dance style, were first made in order to emulate the then popular hollywood style movie of singing, dancing love story. Later on, Bollywood movies began to more directly copy western films, even at times taking entire segments from the originals. Turkish films in particular are known for this practice. However, no matter how close these films mimic the original, the end result is always foreign to a western viewer. With that in mind, we hope at Platypussy Records that these clips will help you to spice up your own life and get the creative juices flowing. Because if some smart soul out there manages to imitate these imitations one more time, the result is guaranteed a bizarre charm all of its own.

Thriller Cover Video

I Am A Disco Dancer

Superman: Indian Version

Japanese Spiderman!

Any word on the film origin of this gold? Platypussies represent!

2006-11-25T20:45:00.000-05:00

Bollywood breaks, indeed.

And with any good bollywood dance scene follows the obligatory ass-kicking.

If that doesn't do it for you...

2006-11-20T00:45:00.000-05:00

Daniel Johnston dancing is about the most inspiring thing I've ever seen. I don't care if you've already seen it or not.

Ima no Kimochi Donna Kimochi?

2006-11-15T23:52:00.000-05:00

Sometimes all you need to get the creative juices going is a bit of insanity. Something to loosen you up and realize that, "Hey... it IS possible!" Well, although Platypussy Records has yet to change its mission statement to include motivational therapy, we're still behind you 100%. So in what will hopefully be an ongoing experiment in Dadaism and creative techniques, I gladly present a thrift store find from Japan by one Singalong Sam!

This Video comes from a animated cartoon of house cleaning tips for children. Specifically, this short song was part of a English education bit included in the middle of a bunch of cleaning advice illustrations. Why? We have no answers for you, but please enjoy as you learn to express your feelings with the help of a snowman and several English speakers! Watch out for the guy in the glasses.

Home Sweet Home

2006-11-14T21:38:00.000-05:00

I always adore leaving my city temporarily. Today I traveled to a seaside town at a high rate of speed, ate lunch, drove around looking out over the Ashley River, and looking at all the really really big really really expensive houses. I saw a woman pushing a stroller down a rich rich street, and I said "I bet she's the Au Pair (spelling may be incorrect, and forgive me, I don't have enough cash money to know how to spell it)!"

But the thing that gets at my heartstrings more than oogling houses, or looking at the buildings, or over the statues and the bridges, is admiring expanses of water, or forests creeping back up alongside the interstate. I'm fascinated by entropy, and I love seeing "nature" encroach back on our hideous constructions and try to reclaim what we ravaged. I do like a lot of modern conveniences, mind you--I would be absolutely devastated without my oven to assist in the making of a perfect lemon icebox pie--but I much prefer the red red of a shedding maple, and the weeds peeking through the asphalt, to the coifed topiaries of faux-English gardens and palmetto trees peeping next to front porches bigger than my entire humble abode.

I hope you all are doing well. Soon I'll start my Christmas confectionary marathons. It might not require running, but you'd be surprised how much a lady can get done, and how much more satisfying it is to make your gifts (at least some) than buy them. My favorite is peppermint bark. If you beg, I just might divulge my secret recipe (I won't even be devious and change the ingredients slightly in order to sabotage your endeavor).

xoxo,
Miss Bettycake

Rising from the Atlantic

2006-11-11T19:02:00.000-05:00

Enter BoBo Wilzon, so-named to make poor Flushboy comfortable with his fading mastery of English language (only a matter of time before half of all blogs are entered in Japanese). If recent trip to Platypussy birthing grounds reaffirmed anything for me, it is the dynamic nature of this entire Daemon Flushboy/Platypussies, Inc. endeavor. Music quickly led into video led into publicity/spin/media-subversive generator led into visual art DIY explosion of the spring leads into... writing? Well, each step is positive, has to be positive; even the negation of the previously-taken step is positive. Movement is king. So let me briefly retort:
1) Daemon Flushboy DVD still to come, but international collaboration and poverty are a tricky mix.
2) Should be read as "End is the Beginning for Platypussy Records". More members, more geographical spheres of influence rising from lack of manic DIY all-in-the-house parties.
3) Welcome BettyCake and MotherStamper, two fine established thinkers and wonderful people to boot. Death to the Sausage Party!!!

I look forward to my Sendai trip and it drives me as I work 80 hours a week to save the necessary $$$. It's wonderful to know that Columbia can also provide regenerative health values for low price and long train ride.

Daemon Flushboy's Lost Interview

2006-11-11T10:10:00.000-05:00

On a recent trip down to Daemon Flushboy's former home and stomping grounds, a.k.a. Columbia, South Carolina, Will Bovender discovered a piece of Platypussy Records history thought to be lost forever... the lost Daemon Flushboy Class Project Interview. Filmed by Marti Mansion for a media arts assignment, this film was never previously released... anywhere.... not even to the band itself!

When asked for feedback on the band's philosophy and general rhetoric, Marti replied that it was "...good, but some people didn't know whether or not it was a joke. Afterwards they kept asking me if you were being serious or not." I can't imagine a better outcome. So take a first hand look behind the facade for an intimate interview with Daemon Flushboy.

Daemon Flushboy vs. The Virgin Mary

2006-11-04T00:22:00.000-05:00

At some point in early 2004, Daemon Flushboy began work on a music/performance/low budget art film that would never be published. It still hasn't, at least in conventional DVD format. To this day untitled and referred to only as the Daemon Flushboy DVD, it's looking like the world will never see a finished version. This doesn't mean you can't enjoy some of the juicy bits we did manage to record...

Daemon Flushboy's Mona Lisa

Mona Lisa is essentially the first Daemon Flushboy video. It featured camera work by Weird Beard and Bass soloing by BoBo Wilzon. The light up Mona Lisa was a souviner from Rome, and was only used twice by us -- once for this video, and once at the Bob Log III birthday bash. Afterwards it promptly retired and never worked properly again. Damn voltage differences.

Hoedown On The Sun

This video marks the beginning of the organ driven Daemon Flushboy. The organ itself was a neglected school donation. Rescued from exile in the school's janatorial closet, we proceeded to rock the hell out of it. A Conn type organ, the song Hoedown On The Sun exploits a minor glitch in the easy chord pedals. Now the organ is currently on exhibit at the James Beard Heritage Library of Columbia, SC. Features custom glow in the dark back piece, only displayed once during the Bob Log III Birthday Bash. In fact, Bob Log complimented this organ, saying that it was much better than the one he had at home. Nice.

Daemon Flushboy Live!

Finally, as a bonus, here's a video highlighting what we really wanted our video to be-- a synthesis of Daemon Flushboy freak out improvisational music and creepy visuals. During a retuning of the organ, we turned on the strobe and played this piece while shooting video of the inside of the organ.

All video was shot on a sony super 8 cassette camera. I got it for free out of a dumpster. Quality sucks, but we're still lo-fi as fuck!

A Warm Welcome

2006-11-04T00:15:00.000-05:00

I'm welcoming myself. I just heard about this project today and man oh man did I get excited. I'm so grateful to be a part of something that's going to be great. I'm wiggling my tail like a basset puppy. Like Hush Puppy. Man, I need some new shoes.

Anyhow, let me introduce myself: I am Miss Betty Cake. I'm a henchwoman of sorts for the Platypussy Management Team, and a serious admirer of Daemonflushboy. This is, of course, my first posting. I feel a little self-conscious. I have no one's skirt to hide behind.

Let me start getting it all out in the open--a bit about me: I love whimsy. I love it so much I have a reputation for being a bit of a flake. I like to surprise myself. I like to pretend to hide little trinkets around the house--in drawers, in my caboodle, left under the bedside table, in my sewing box, in the catch-alls on my desk, so I can surprise myself when I find them, unexpectedly, or while "cleaning up." I think it's really just a cover for being messy and unorganized, but I like it just the same. Last winter I found a bracelet in an old coat pocket that had been there since I tended a neighbor's horses while they vacationed. It had gotten tangled inside the coat lining. I cut it out. At the grocery store tonight I found a grocery list stuck under some tomatoes. Tomatoes weren't even on the list. I put it back, to surprise someone else.

I plan to keep you posted about the adventures I encounter/create in what most people would consider the mundane.

Tonight, I did a similar thing with MEAT. I used to be a good eater--by that I mean I used to be a vegetarian. I trembled all the time like Charlotte and her little web, so I took to eating it again. First slowly. But then, I fell off the wagon and I'm a full on carnivore now (and yes, I am sometimes very ashamed of myself). But I buy in bulk, both with my dish detergent, my paper towels, and my foodstuffs. Tonight, I got tired of the old A.R. labeling I do to prevent recipe confusion (somehow Pork chops A La King doesn't whet my appetite). I went renegade with my sharpie. Pork chops became "Bust Yo's!" and "Porky Balboa," and cube steak says "not a square," "Picasso's Flesh," and is complete with diagrams and mathematical equations. I'm glad to have been invited to the party. I'll try my best to not outstay my welcome, but I am a bit of a Chatty Cathy.

Nice to MEAT you!
My pleasure!

xoxo,
Miss Betty Cake

The Beginning

2006-11-03T20:58:00.000-05:00

The beginning is the end of Platypussy Records.